Funny comebacks for friends reddit. It's not my fault you're so niave.
Funny comebacks for friends reddit ) - To humorously mock or humiliate someone with a well-timed joke, diss or comeback. Being called “stupid” can sting, but laughter is the best medicine. The tone from some people is like I’m being irresponsible having this many living creatures in two. 58M subscribers in the funny community. We welcome any folks from the Asian diaspora--not just American--as well as anyone who identifies with the label 'Asian,' regardless of immigration history. Just say sarcastically, "haha wow so original" or say "sure thing, that will be $50 thanks" It's all a spectrum. Jan 8, 2025 · Reddit-Inspired Comebacks for Your Dad Left You. The problem in trying to be funny and being bad at it is that you appear unconfident. 9K comments. 1. Ask for and post your best comebacks here! Posted by u/More-Equipment5022 - 88 votes and 163 comments We are the biggest Reddit community dedicated to discussing, teaching and learning Spanish. r/Comebacks A chip A close button. Luckily, he froze for a second and processed what I said and started laughing. I guess this qualifies as a "comeback" Once a friend brought his new girlfriend to the bar to meet "the gang. 44M subscribers in the AskReddit community. Have you ever dreamed of being effortlessly witty, delightfully dry, maybe even perfectly poised in any situation that calls Apr 15, 2021 · The best roasts end up on the 'Clever Comebacks' subreddit, a community of nearly 754k members, eagerly combing the corners of the internet for humorous, witty, and razor-sharp comebacks. I usually refer to my tall friends as “beanpole” often after telling them to shut up. When it sounds fake or forced you know they're not interested in the conversation much less in the mood to share a laugh. 36 votes, 94 comments. 46K subscribers in the Comebacks community. If one of my friends ask me, I just say, "Because it worked out so well for you?" That means a lot coming from someone as untrustworthy as you. Its pretty normal, my friend group did the same, and we are still friends after 8 years just more mature now. Try staying calm and stop trying to force yourself to say something funny and then saying whats on your mind. You tried. If none of these links help answer your question and you are not within the LGBT+ community, questioning your identity in any way, or asking in support of either a relative or friend, please ask your question over in r/AskLGBT. At an old job I came in before my boss and started cleaning out the office basement. The giants will respect you for that as they are often wimps and need people like you to bring them together and make them useful. “Stupid? I prefer the term ‘creatively challenged. Below you’ll find the best of them. It falls in line with our logical thinking but it feels like a disadvantage sometimes in life 34 votes, 107 comments. They'll get it. My daughter’s “respectful comeback” to comments, made by one of her ignorant (ex)friend, about the typical Asian stereotypes, mostly about math… Daughter: “one day you’re going to rely on an Asian to audit your taxes, you better hope it isn’t me” Ex-friend: “is that what you’re going to major in” A subreddit to ask for our provide recommendations of any relevant media based on other media people like - whether it be music, television, video games, movies, or anything else. Sep 8, 2023 · What Are Some Funny Comebacks for Friends? The best place to test out your comebacks and flex your sense of humor is with your friends. this is one of my friends, so i'd like something funny and not too antagonistic 47M subscribers in the AskReddit community. Business, Economics, and Finance. someone calls you ugly… It starts off as a comeback but ends up with you guys bonding by fighting the forces of evil. Hmm back when I was in school I used to be more reserved and avoided conflict so people never really expected me to talk back to them. im unable to think of something funny as a comeback(my mind literally goes Thank you for your reply - that's probably the reason. I can see from your playing skills that she's probably VERY dissatisfied. A non relaxed joke is what kills the joke. It really isn't a big deal. Next time they call me a simp, I'll have a comeback up my sleeve. Ask for and post your best comebacks here! At a certain point, my friend, who I was playing with, just full-on said: "Okay, you're just being toxic because you're sad your girlfriend isn't in love with you anymore. CUTTING but FUNNY comeback to "already seen this" or "you're the 5th person to send me this" when sending someone a meme on instagram that reminded you of them I HATE it when people do this. I’ve been trying to think of clever comebacks for when your partner introduces you to a friend and they say the usual (in a jokey kinda way) if you hurt them I’ll hurt/kill you. I said nothing. i have an iron deficiency. Lol being short actually did save my life once. eg. ” “If the sky starts falling, you’ll be hit first” 6 funny comebacks that might make your friend come back (NOT GUARENTEED) If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. 46M subscribers in the AskReddit community. She was really good at coming up with quick remarks. So I was watching the movie fifty fifty (or 50/50) yesterday and Joseph Gordon Levitts character shaves his head in the film… Worrying about being quick, funny, and cool is not going to help you make a witty comeback and, as we've all experienced, it's going to do the exact opposite. Best comeback to “you’re not funny?” There’s this one kid in my class who does NOT shut up about how amazing he is (he’s not). Often (but not always) a verbal or visual pun, if it elicited a snort or face palm then our community is ready to groan along with you. . I found that hilarious, but that is kind of aggressively sexual. She said to my friends, "Do you actually enjoy hanging out with him or does he pay you to be his friends?" I jumped in saying that I do in fact pay them to be my friends -- and that I'm a trust-fund baby. Boss came in half an hour later with a worried look on his face apparently he was fixing a light in the basement and he left a live wire hanging from the ceiling I didn't even notice it. This subreddit is filled with comebacks of all kinds, the one thing they all have in common is being witty. Remember that this is a safe space for LGBT+ and questioning individuals, so we want to make sure that this place is If you want to playfully insult a friend, give a sassy comeback, or stop an unwanted advance, we’ve got your back with this comprehensive list of roasts! New York’s legendary Friars Club held its first roast of Maurice Chevalier in 1949, where, as the guest of honor, he was subjected to hilarious and risqué jokes at his expense. Aug 24, 2024 · Funny insults for kids. Just a jokey kinda comeback so you’re not just sat there doing an awkward laugh. Need comebacks on my friend who keeps calling me "Gay" I need some advice to stop my friend from continuing to call me "Gay" we are both in the same year level and in high school. A reminder to our users that ALL posts are now only to be answered by women only, unless the OP has chosen the Male and Female Participation Welcome flair. I might be mistaken because not all beautiful girls will approach you. I do not have the time or the crayons to explain this to you. “Any taller and you’ll get a nosebleed/altitude sickness” “Just remember, I’m the right height to uppercut you in the groin. Good acquaintances are expendable and can stay in contact but never really there like most people on social medias, a real friend it would never cross your mind to expend or cross them because of Why don't we become friends and share the wonderful Roblox camaraderie? If you ain't one, say: What makes you think that's an insult? You have the body of a slender, bitch! 19 votes, 32 comments. Jul 16, 2024 · Comebacks When Someone Says You Have No Friends. I like to wear colourful outfits mixed with unusual details. Guys on Reddit have recounted stories with some of the rudest and meanest comebacks. i have a groupchat with 4 of my friends and we are good buddies and stuff but we quite often start roasting each other badly(99% are gay,dick,fucked ur sister)type of roasts now im the weakest in this and all my friends have started attacking me. I was so fortunate he thought it was funny, because at that level of age and experience, I might have wet myself. it didn't work. which makes it a 3v1. Funny comebacks can lighten the mood and show you’re not bothered by the insult. Welcome to the r/spinalcordinjuries subreddit where the community can discuss, share, and help each other. Reddit is a treasure trove of humor and creativity, and some of the best comebacks come straight from Reddit threads. When it comes to being witty, there are two general approaches. ) The other day me and some friends were in school and this kid came up to my friend to harass him. Getting new friends every time someone annoys you isn't usually possible. I’m actually under 25 and that’s not old at all 2. Reddit's largest humor depository Guy: "Ewww!" - Say this: "Your mom said that to you when you were born" Guy: "You suck" - Say This: "Hola soy dora, can you find where I asked for… 13 votes, 57 comments. Roasting (v. " A subreddit for those who love the Rhacodactylus Auriculatus. For anyone who needs some comeback inspiration, here are 15 clever comebacks from individuals who knew just what to say in the heat of the moment. Please share this page if you like them. Well, I never trusted you. He was taunting him and said "are you coming to my birthday at wacky warehouse?" My immediate response was "your hairline is wacky" and he calmed tf down Chuckle, and quietly remark "whelp, not every joke lands" or "that was hilarious in my head". For the snarky tones I would love a good comeback but my sleep deprived brain can’t think of anything. Some demisexuals may feel very close to asexuality and experience attraction to extremely few people in their entire lifetimes, and each may take a very long time to develop, while others may find attraction develops more frequently and often find themselves crushing on their friends. don't confuse them as friends they're very different and look like friends. Here are 27 clever comebacks that totally owned. '” My friends keep calling me simp for bringing up girls, then I explained to them what it actually means, they didn't listen. Here are a few Reddit-style comebacks inspired by that wild internet culture. Two of my friends were having an argument(Jim and Dan, lets call them) Jim had apparently decided to win So, after Dan makes a point Jim responds with "At least my shins don't hurt" "At the very least, I'm not humiliated to have more homies than you. Reddit's largest humor depository However when it comes to hanging out with my friends or simply trying to have a fun conversation, sometimes I freeze and don’t know what to say or say the wrong thing and it’s not funny. Answer or ask questions, share information, stories and more on themes related to the 2nd most spoken language in the world. I used to just say "you're _____" but I began to irritate myself so any suggestions would be cool. r/AskReddit is the place to ask and answer thought-provoking questions. (As defined by urbandictionary) Hone your roasting skills, meet other roasters, and get yourself roasted! Posted by u/Amfame - 26 votes and 86 comments "Salaam! Thank you for your submission to r/hijabis. He puts others down for the sake of feeling better about himself and thinks he’s the smartest, funniest, best guy ever, and he doesn’t like it when people say he’s wrong—he HAS to be right about 1K votes, 241 comments. Then one day on the school bus during a class trip, this one kid pointed to some random girl getting on the bus and shouted “Hey, (my name), there’s your honey!” and without missing a beat- it just popped into my head- I replied “Hey, there’s yours 2. 21. Of course you are more than welcome to just show off your scaly little friend or their enclosure. You are not a king nor a god ,no one in this world was placed here to please you,you Are a mere peice of trash wined up on the shore of a beach with the sole purpose of being a sheer waste product in this world, u bring nothing but pain and suffering in this world,you lower peoples self esteem to raise your ego. I would like some comebacks in this scenario. BTW - neither dogs nor kids are being rowdy, just waking along. Great and all your friends laugh at you (while smirking) It will make them question their own friends and make them insecure 2. 11 votes, 38 comments. You have the attention span of an ice cream in July. Here are a few sharp comebacks to have in your arsenal when someone says “You have no friends”: “Quality over quantity, my friend”, “I’d rather have no friends than fake ones”, “I don’t need a crowd to validate my awesomeness”, or “Funny, I was just thinking how much better And I hear things like "wow you got a big nose" from friends, and exaggerating this would be something like "be careful about what you have in mind, my nose is so big that I actually can even smell your thoughts" or "yes especially trees have a lot to do when I breathe, I take a lot of oxygen and give them a lot of carbon dioxide back". 22. Just used last night! Highly effective! Just a reminder that this is NOT r/clevercomebacks and the sub isn’t meant for smart mouths but rather just funny replies that use the circumstances and people involved to create a situational based joke! Oct 26, 2024 · Reddit's /r/clevercomebacks is a subreddit where people post the most savage comebacks they find online. I have a lot of friends that ask me this question. Members Online You make weird jokes, I tell you my trauma My friend did a psychology project on dropping heresay like this in conversations that didn't have any substantiation or context and almost every time the person would become paranoid. 17K subscribers in the Comebacks community. Please do not message mods to approve your post. 9K votes, 7. 39K subscribers in the Comebacks community. And solitude gets old. This one's going right in my back pocket. It’s funny because Cinco de Mayo isn’t even “Mexican” or “Mexican-American” day, it’s a celebration of the Mexican victory at the Battle of Puebla But I wouldn’t expect someone like that person to know that May 31, 2024 · Either way, they can be found on Reddit's /r/clevercomebacks. Then later he bought up again how strong he was and what crazy challenges he has been putting his body through to improve even more. 37K subscribers in the Comebacks community. Because I have an outtie my friends like to say that my vagina (and anyone who has an outtie) is gross, and blah blah blah. Your friends would much rather you fuck up a few jokes than be a mute. ” “Is this comeback straight . AskWomen: A subreddit dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences; providing a place where all women can comfortably and candidly share their responses in a non-judgmental space. The convos in Monica’s room are really funny but it hurts to watch Ross & Rachel! This one lives rent free on my mind since I first watched friends in 2005 16 votes, 68 comments. Someone help… Oct 20, 2024 · Funny Comebacks When Someone Calls You Stupid. I wouldn't consider myself clever or witty, and I need some better comebacks, for any situation. In a goofy way its how ur friends show they like u, same way when a girl hits you. He said "You're alright. She jokingly replied that she will send 2 my way because my apartment is “so spacious”. 7 Best Mean Comebacks From Reddit. If it’s a group of them say, and you all talk shit about eachother behind eachothers backs (while also smirking). 56M subscribers in the funny community. 13 votes, 17 comments. I'm sure you don't have any friends!" "So don't waste your fucking time with me because you could be losing your virginity right now. People keep saying this as a way to tell people to back off 31 votes, 90 comments. 47M subscribers in the AskReddit community. Oddly enough, the couple that is still married have never said anything about me being single. " comments sorted by Best Top New Controversial Q&A Add a Comment Not a comeback but a story, so one of the people I know(he is now an okay friends of mine) we used to hate each other, and he once pointed out something embarrassing, I hit him with the “you go there and I’ll tell them how you once sniffed another dudes butt in the bus and then he did that to you” A neighbor couple got into a screaming fight once, just yelling things at each other, when the woman inevitably played the little dick card, when this king, without missing a beat, screamed back, "Well shit, I'm so sorry I couldn't contribute more than five and a half inches of the literal miles of dick that have gone through you. There is a good book about jokes by Jimmy Carr, the British comedian. So one of my toxic friends just say this to me from time to time and I don't really have a good response to it. Its probably akin to when people say "thats funny" or "that's too/so funny", sometimes with a hesitant but fake laugh but same dry body language, except more on the sarcastic or take-the-hint side. That’s it. " Male friend: "They don't give trophies for last place" What are your favorite comebacks you've picked up from this sub? Have you used them in real situations and what was their response? “I’ve heard worse from better” Never used it but would sounds catchy. " Furthermore, the term "gay" is not an insult. With a little humor, you can turn the tables and leave the other person laughing. I said I would take one. I hoped to the gods that he found it funny enough to NOT hospitalize me. GameStop Moderna Pfizer Johnson & Johnson AstraZeneca Walgreens Best Buy Novavax SpaceX Tesla 51 votes, 219 comments. " 229 votes, 762 comments. When I wore a silly printed tee with a long black and blue plaid silk skirt, and teeth earrings, one of my colleagues told me I looked like an ‘evil Miss Frizzle’. This is a subreddit for the podcast, Distractible, hosted by Mark Fischbach, Wade Barnes, and Bob Milkskin. Archived post. These hilarious, friendly exchanges can help you test every burn to ensure they are epic. 45M subscribers in the AskReddit community. I'm a girl. Says the one who's turning on me right now. Its not bc she wants to assault you, but its her way of breaking the touch barrier and getting closer to u. It might help you see the funny side of things which might give you some confidence in saying those things out loud. One friend was saying how much of a soldier he is snd how solid he was and how he had been working out so hard lately. " eg. " One of the women in our group said to her, "Oh, you're so cute," to which the friend inexplicably replied, "Oh, if you think she's cute, you should have seen my last girlfriend. It'd be far more tactful if they pretended they haven't seen it, or say something like "love this one". Someone was trashing on a user here on Reddit while using awful punctuation. This guy's giving you some practical advice. This is a friendly place for those cringe-worthy and (maybe) funny attempts at humour that we call dad jokes. Noticed during an argument if someone makes it personal I often found it takes me a while to come up with a comeback that stings. The tone of most people is funny/empathetic etc. Get app Get the Advertise on Reddit; Shop Collectible Avatars; Get the Reddit app Scan this QR code to download the app now. If you need urgent medical advice, please seek help from a medical professional. I’m probably just overthinking it but I feel like I’m not very interesting as a person and these thoughts make me struggle a lot with my self-worth and Wᴇʟᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ʀ/SGExᴀᴍs – the largest community on reddit discussing education and student life in Singapore! SGExams is also more than a subreddit - we're a registered nonprofit that organises initiatives supporting students' academics, career guidance, mental health and holistic development, such as webinars and mentorship programmes. (edit) So I've gotten a lot of "if i wanted my comeback I'd wipe it off your mom's chin/mouth/face/etc. A friend is rare regardless of your charisma, good acquaintances are not. These comebacks were true debate-stoppers, there's nothing left to say after these were commented. Petty revenge, nuclear revenge, malicious compliance, FAFO, clever comebacks, matching their energy, no contact or just treating them they way they treated you. “Oh wow, the originality here is shocking. It's not my fault you're so niave. Friend asked our group to watch her cats while she is away. I find it amusing because all of the friends that ask me this have all been divorced at least once except for one couple. Based on your prompt, it sounds like the person you’re referring to is saying it like “you’re not funny” like they think you’re trying to be funny but you’re not or something. Some minor acknowledgement the joke wasn't funny that time. Fair warning: Things will get nasty if you play dirty with your friends. It’s so vulgar and I get so uncomfortable- these people are Probably not my friends but it’s who I’ve Grown up with majority of my life. What can I say back that is funny. 34K subscribers in the Comebacks community. Friends would probably take that as a joke but I’m sure OP could get in a lot of trouble at work/school for harassment or making a hostile work environment or whatever. Reddit would be proud. 18 votes, 61 comments. /r/asianamerican is an Asian American and Pacific Islander (AAPI) focused subreddit. To answer your question - I don't mean to get competitive, I just have absolutely no patience with this guy anymore, after he repeatedly attempted to throw me under the bus because he thought I would invade his friendship (we have a mutual friend and oh no, I did spend time with that mutual friend here and there!). Let me buy you a drink!" And continued laughing. someone calls you stupid -"You call me stupid one more time, Imma talk your test result and shove it down your ass. If that’s the case my first instinct would be go deadpan and say “good because this is very serious” and crack a wry smile. Female friend: "I'll just meet a doctor and become a trophy wife. I’d slap you but I don’t want to make your face look any better. Any ideas? Another time, I was at a bar with some friends bantering back and forth with the bartender. 52K subscribers in the Comebacks community. 5K votes, 717 comments. Oct 19, 2023 · Here are the best comebacks for your sassy and savage future moments. I think it might even be an old psychology trick, not sure What's the best comeback when you send some funny or ugly picture to your friend and he says, "Don't send YOUR pictures. When I do, it’s usually way past the argument itself but it’s a comeback that’s pretty funny or mean. Everyone here is welcome to ask questions and provide answers in regards to the proper husbandry, care, handling and breeding of Gargoyle Geckos. Posted by u/Ok-Travel9142 - 1 vote and no comments 25 votes, 111 comments. 23 votes, 74 comments. I remember friend of mine would know to say f* you back, with a baseball bat, make your weenie go quack quack quack ( comeback of age range,roughly 10 or sub-10 year old children when I was about 10 years old. mbzawyjtvcyuhychybcrtgvgefmkxwpnqjwztbnuodykpzgwfo