I don t like when my girlfriend goes out She is the best person I know. You need to tell her, break up, and let both of you move on. These show you don't love your girlfriend anymore. Steps. i'll be honest my boyfriend isn't really someone who i like to go clubbing with. I immediately thought about she going to the club. So don’t go crazy and think she’s in the club searching for someone to sleep with. I just need some words of experience and wisdom. We stand with third party apps. But I would like if you would please send me a text if you realize you're not going to be coming home when you initially planned on. I definitely would have a different stance if she was frequently seeking to go out and party w/o me and the rest of her friends were single. So anyways, the only reason I don't like her currently smoking is because I feel like she doesn't respect me, she might do something stupid again, or she doesn't care what I think (even though she's cried over me telling her how I feel about You couldn't be more clear that you don't trust her. Terrible take. Now, I know all about not wanting to be “that guy”. You get to date her because she wants to date you and you want to date her. HOWEVER, it does sound like something else is going on. We’ve never had an argument or anything, but all we seem to do is have sex and lie in bed, and honestly I just feel like every second I spend with her I’m wasting my time? Here are 3 ways to not be jealous when your boyfriend goes out. It's like I don't love her anymore but I don't want to lose her value as being a constant in my life. Yep, you don't deserve her. Not at the moment. We do whatever, hang out with other people and whatnot (no restrictions whatsoever) but when she goes out clubbing or drinking I Turns out, it went amazing. I don't have any friends here. You don't deserve to date any girl, not even a poor ugly one with bad parents. she is very very friendly and we live in a college town, so you can imagine Some people get mad when their partner hangs out with their friends. As far as jealousy goes I used to be SUPER jealous to the point I was toxic to be around as a whole. Good luck! The fact that random guys might touch my girlfriend without her wanting it makes me very uncomfortable. As you can probably guess, this makes my For me, it's if I don't say anything, I don't sleep, can't sit still, and fall into depression. Whenever she goes out drinking to a bar or something, i get super anxious. You act like things just happen to you. I like your perspective, show how the frugal way is more fun. I just don’t think I can stand behind the compromise. She feels happy when she drinks. It's hard to go out when you don't have any money. I'm “We don’t like the dark, Nick. Just do something fun with your friends to distract you. That’s so awesome she bought a dress for u. You don't deserve anyone. We went out with a few friends last night, and my girlfriend stayed over at my place. If despite these tips, you feel like you don’t know how to overcome jealousy, perhaps it is a good idea to talk with a professional to help you recognize your virtues and cultivate your independence. No one in the family likes her and we really dont like her now. She knows what she is doing. In fact, she even doesn't have that many male friends. i have friends i enjoy to go out clubbing with, of mixed genders who are into the scene and i can just enjoy the night with. I told her to call me when she’s ready and she just replied “I love you” and that’s it. Go out with her and have a good time. You can do other things together. I don’t know how to make it go away. If I do say something, it's like I'm being obsessive or controlling and also feel guilty for saying anything Me and my gf (20) have been dating for 1 year and we are about to start long distance (only 2 hours away). I think you still like her and if she should agree to see you more often you would stay with her. I don't have to text my husband a million times to let him know where I am or who I'm with, although I do let him know where I am and who I'm with just for safety, but not because he doesn't trust me. Don't be such a killjoy. You've agreed to date. However, don’t use the biology excuse. Bottom line is she never tells me when she I don’t want to seem like THAT guy but my girlfriend goes out to the bar a lot more than im comfortable with. The tops showed quite a bit of skin, some were almost the equivalent to wearing a bra out. I'm always extremely anxious while she's partying and I can never sleep and am always awake until she's home. I bet she would be thrilled to have her boyfriend their to dance with and talk to. It's only controlling if you are forcing someone to give up alcohol when they don't want to. She wasn't high, and the last 6 times we've seen each other went incredible. I am completely alone here. If that’s not what you like to do then that’s what you don’t like to do. Certain behavioral traits of your girlfriend’s friends might annoy you, but it is only for the few hours that you hang out with them. Your girl could be going to the club because of either one of those reasons, or all of them. This is not the Puritan age (a time when having fun was banned). You don’t have to pretend anymore. We don't even speak on the phone/discord and when we do she just does something else in the meantime and no conversation can be made. when im dancing i like to be in my own space, i dont like people crowding me or feeling like i need to be attentive to him. I feel neglected by her lately, but I don't want to forbid her from partying either. dude, it's totally normal to have friends and go out w/out your SO on occasion. I feel like I keep hearing things like “my friends don’t like my boyfriend/girlfriend, BUT blah blah blah they don’t know them like I do and whatever self-deceiving reasons. This town is small and not much goes on around here. I have a similar friend circle to her (my "BFF" won't talk to my boyfriend at all, one of the guys mocked him within hearing distance, some of the other Gottlieb suggests that if the partner who drinks more, really needs to go out and drink all those margaritas, then let them go out on their own. We finally came to the compromise of her being able to go to bars with her friends, without me, for girls night as long as she’s home by 2am. 1. I guarantee you you’re relationship with grow by If I want to go out with my friends, or to a concert, or camping for a weekend, or to a party, or to a bar, I just go. I now find out my older son is dating her now. But I’ve also got a solution: I’m going to break up with her very soon and say goodbye forever. I just feel like she prefers to go out without me and it's more fun without me. I need some advice / tips on how to not feel anxious when she goes out with her But let’s first take a look at the signs that your relationship is leaving you feeling depleted. Either she's insecure about you (like how you act in public or something like that) or she's already detached from the relationship and isn't inviting you for the sole purpose of slowly cutting the cord. Don't make her feel bad about her drinking habits. I have not confronted her as we are on a family trip and I don't want to ruin and traumatise the holiday in our children's mind forever. If that’s the case, “there is a chance that you won't feel like a priority later Having solo hobbies like attending a weekend yoga class, playing a sport with friends, or exploring new coffee shops without your coffee-despising partner isn't a bad thing, but if your partner I don’t like her and I increasingly don’t like her the better I get to know her. I just don’t understand how she’s with her best friend every day and can’t hang out with me for just a few hours. So Me and my girlfriend (17 F) talked about this club thing a while back and she yesterday bringed this up saying "I have something to tell you even though I know you'll not like it". I really love moments like that, they truly make me happy and realize why I love her so much. I'm having the same issue as OP, new girlfriend and I am dreading the conversation, "we should scale it back". And they can see the relationship from an outsider’s view. However, if your anxiety about your partner being away is getting in the way of your daily life, that’s a cause for concern. Maybe once 3 years ago but thats probably it. My girl is very attractive and it just happens, you have to let it go. It sounds like you need to do some self-reflection here, it's very healthy to have independent time apart from each other. Archived post. Don’t get me wrong, I trust her 300%, I just don’t trust other guys :/ There was an incident about a week ago where 4 girls got roofied at a party that isn’t too far from where she plans to go. First of all, I'm in the final year of my studies. One minute, a girl can’t get enough of you, the next, she’s attending parties without you. So I spend 5 days every week in the office, and come home late, so I don't have time for my hobbies, no time to hang out We've been together for a year now, and for the entire year ive been suffering from one single thing. She did not like me and she didnt want my son at my house. Sure you need to make some effort to hang with her friends (just like she needs to be spending time with your people), but that doesnt mean she should pressure you into hanging out with people that aren't on your wavelength, thats what a selfish, narcissist does. If you don't want to be with her, then don't be. I was visiting her and she showed me some tops she recently bought going to bars and frats. If you want to improve your level of well-being, in therapyside we can help you. I know I need therapy but I can’t My girlfriend and I have been together 5 years, both 24, and I don't like how she goes clubbing. I don't have a single reason not to trust her. Today we just stayed in bed all day, watching a movie, acting silly, etc. Even though we haven't been "in a relationship" in the past year, I still talk to her about everything - work, movies, anything I'm thinking of etc, my troubles (only if it's unrelated to love or romance) 15 votes, 19 comments. ***This is an It’s okay to decide that you don’t want to be in a committed relationship. I don’t know how to stop feeling like this. . I have two dogs, but other than that I have no one. And it just puts a strain on my relationship. So, there it is. But you are also only human, and worry just so [] At a neutral time, talk to her. 92 votes, 128 comments. I don’t want that. 90% of the time she goes out I’m not with her because of the distance. Don’t mistake it. Isn’t that what you want?” “No. You’re not alone. Method 1. Why would she respect you if you don’t respect yourself. She has told me that on a few occasions, men have actually tried to send her drinks or sit with her. And to go out and get blackout drunk and ruin those plans just seems like was getting swept away and was just going with the flow until my intervention and thank me but honestly the majority don't like my Please believe me when I tell you that I’m not trying to be contrary but it has literally always been my experience that whenever people tell you, “ it’s not you I don’t trust it’s the other people who might try to lead you astray” what they’re actually telling me is that they have trust issues and insecurity issues and therefore don’t trust anyone, including me. Just like you don’t need an argument for not being a morning person or liking your coffee in a certain way. Whether you hug, hold hands, kiss, or cuddle, you’ll feel nothing special. I just dont like her going out without me being able to protect her. My girlfriend says she feels trapped because I don’t let her go to bars for girls night. ” Your friends might not know the person you’re dating like you do, but they know YOU. Without her. I really don't care when she goes out because I trust her. You shouldn’t have tried to keep us there. Hello, Hopefully1. ” I(43M) just found out that my wife(43F) is cheating on me with another married guy since almost 1 year. and I don't like the idea of her being flooded with guys with alcohol involved. I was so happy when they split up. Girls wont go out with friends because of the boyfriend, friends give girl slack for her boyfriend not being cool and start to pull away from her because she wont go out with them. The issue isn't that I don't trust her, I just don't understand why anyone in a long term relationship would go out clubbing, getting extremely drunk everytime. Whenever you see her or come across anything about her, you'll be uninterested with no zeal to pay attention to it. My family isn't too far away, but they never come to visit me. Jealousy comes from a lack of trust. We used to play games/watch movies/go out regularly, now we don't. I don’t know why I feel like this or where it stems from. Why? Because they have the training and experience to help you make If your girlfriend would rather go out without you, it doesn’t sound like she considers you to be “the one” for her. If you’ve ever wondered, “Why can’t I sleep when my partner is away?” or “Why do I get anxious when my partner leaves,” don’t worry. However, she regularly goes out of her way after school to send a friend away or something. I don’t like my girlfriend anymore: 13 reasons to break up for good Here you can read more about how not to be jealous. When she goes, I literally sit and refresh snapchat, Instagram and FB constantly, scanning for any updates that might validate or disprove my anxiety. I want it to stop and I try to talk myself down but when the time comes I can’t shake the feeling. Reasons Why Your Girlfriend Goes Out Without You? Just because your girlfriend goes out without you doesn’t necessarily mean she’s being unfaithful or trying to distance herself from the relationship. That is worse than drinking itself. Long story short, my girl friend loves to go out to bars and clubs without me. She doesn't do it that often, maybe once a month, always with a friend/friends. We have a happy and healthy relationship, and have been together almost 4 years. How do I cope with her for another 2 weeks? Relationships are complicated. And when I try to talk with her about it, she gets mad. I don’t think you need an argument to convince her. Moral of the story: Only date people who don't drink. If she truly cares about you then she shouldn’t mind that you don’t want to go. That's not how life works. Most women wait for their man to lead the way to a better relationship and if he doesn’t, they become unhappy and look for ways to get out of it. tl;dr;: Im uncomfortable with my So my girlfriend moved 2 hours away to college. It feels inappropriate. Guys constantly hit on her at work, in public, etc. I was jealous bc I was insecure about This is a really great answer. You know the one who tries to cage his girlfriend and dictate her every move. You have no right to a relationship. Everyone has a diffrenet character and this is yours and you have been together for 3 years so she should know that. She doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, doesn't do drugs and doesn't flirt with the other guys. I'm sure you don't want to hear it, It sounds to me like perhaps your girlfriend is just a bit shy, Go for it. My friend, confronting guys for checking out your girlfriend is a quick way to lose your girlfriend. 287K subscribers in the rant community. So my girlfriend(F22) likes to go out a lot lately and without me. Maybe you’ve also simply stopped saying and doing the types of things that make her feel attracted to you. I personally never went out like this. ” “What the fuck are you talking about?” I was crying now, full tears streaming down my face. “It will be easier this way. Problem solved. The redesign is bad, don't use it. When in a relationship, it's a partnership and you don't go with former lovers and numerous people of the opposite sex to party and If she doesn't go out and party with her friends because she fears lash back from you, she's going to resent you. A partner should not force one into compromisimg situations. I feel like garbage. And it doesnt make it better that all of her coworkers are men, and types i dont like. Thank you for taking your time to answer to this thread. We've been dating for around 6 months, I like her, but I (24 years old) have a full time job, and she (26 years old) is still studying. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. She’s plays the “you don’t trust me” card and you act like you have no choice in the matter. Method 1 of 3 Keeping your distance or seeming standoffish may give them the impression that you don’t like them or don’t want to spend time When you stop loving your girlfriend, you don't feel any emotional connection with her. You just don't want to admit it to yourself. You have no obligation to be with anyone, even if you like them. Feeling like you can't trust your boyfriend when he goes out isn't uncommon, Spend quality time together by planning weekly date nights so you don’t feel left out. She knew I was excited for it. You need to stay calm around them. Im just scared that somthing is going to happen to her. In a way, it may strengthen your relationship because it will show her that you are an independent person and are not too needy/clingy. In this article, we will discuss the steps to understand how to control jealousy, improve this behaviour and leave behind what makes us enter into the dynamics of Your behavior might be the reason why they don’t like you. However, if it makes you uncomfortable Long story short, my girl friend loves to go out to bars and clubs without me. I've seen it happen a lot at my school. She's told you she wants to be with you. How To Deal With Your Girlfriend Going You don't "run out" of things to say to your best friend and you don;t have to force conversation. Shes with you, and probably doesn’t give a damn about anyone else. "Honey, you don't need my permission to stay out late -- I don't want to stop you from doing that at all. I'm 23 this year and my girlfriend is 22. The thing is though, whenever she goes back home, I feel very sad, and lonely. I don’t have much advice but you shouldn’t feel bad about not wanting to go. Dude, if I didn't know better, I'd say that I was your girlfriend. She drinks because she feels good about it. Ignore this person at all costs. Learn to trust your partner. Don't deny yourself the chance of happiness and don't deny her the same. My girlfriend, on the other hand, is loving it up at her new school. Maybe this sounds possessive, but I don't like the idea of my girlfriend getting dressed up like she's "going out", and then going and sitting at a cocktail bar alone all evening. She has been out the picture for about 6 months or so. If they don't drink anyways, it's obviously not gonna make a difference to them. My girlfriend also goes out with girlfriends sometimes. I’ve got a problem: I don’t like my girlfriend anymore. You may not be wired for monogamy, and that’s fine. true. Personally I have no problem with my girlfriend going out with her friends but that’s because she rarely wants to if I cant can’t come along, and all of her friends have boyfriends. But I sense you're not absolutely sure. She goes out like once every month maybe twice sometimes. Of course he trusts me. Just don’t act like biology is the reason. 2 But Choose Your I wouldn't do something that is tit-for-tat (so don't go out with your friends drinking in order to "show her what it feels like"). I want to explain what led me to this decision and help you decide if it’s also the right call for you as well. We have quite a few things in common, but I find that talking to her and spending time with her is just draining. I am an introvert and my fiancé likes to hole up and play video games but I encourage him to do things on his own and I also make the effort to (I go to the gym alone, I encourage him to see his friends without me so they catch up and can talk openly, I go to see Whenever my girlfriend goes to a bar, she gets blackout drunk She knew we were getting up early. You get worried when you see your partner with someone else Does she want you to go out to the club with her? Ask her if she wants you to go out with her. But also don’t feel like she’s just going there to just dance and have a good time with her girls. I wouldn't trust her either. For me the makeup thing is like how I am with my hair like when I go to work I make sure it’s fixed and it’s nice but when I’m at home I don’t even care. I think some guys like me feel like we need to show off, and if we don't then it means we are poor or don't have money. Let her know that you understand she is still in a "party" stage of life and don't want to stifle her, but you aren't okay with her drinking to the point of blacking out every time you go out, that you would like to be able to hang out with her and know she will remember it the next day, and that she tends to get unpleasant and picks fights when she drinks that #2 Don't make her feel bad about drinking. Bottom line is she never tells me when she goes out, it usually comes out accidentally from her the next couple days. I get jealous when my girlfriend goes out with her friends and I don’t know why. My two oldest boys were extremely close and now I think she has come in between them. And she should understand and respect that and not try to change you. And I don’t know what to do because it feels like she just doesn’t want to hang out. Speak to a certified relationship counselor about this issue. If I were in college and I told her that my buddy and I were wanting to go to a sorority party, I feel like she wouldn’t like that idea. There are plenty of happily monogamous people with no children. It can be perfectly normal to miss someone you love. I don’t want anything Let’s say you are able to make plans, but the things you do revolve solely around your partner’s interests. You’re 31, not 61. Instead of looking her in the eye and saying “fuck no I don’t trust you, don’t contact me again until your ready to earn it back. Rather than saying, “My girlfriend wants to go out alone with her friends,” and feeling like you’re losing her, work on deepening the attraction, love and respect that she feels for you. asxgcw nyklofxye lzjx ynzl wyioxg rvzlx qzbp bzia ibagsg ttetq